Jordan

What’s a completely useless skill you’re weirdly proud of having?

Being able to produce flatulence noises with my armpit

If your life had a narrator, whose voice would you want and why?

Morgan Freeman

What’s the most embarrassing song you secretly know all the words to?

My ding- a ling - chalk Chuck Berry

What’s one tiny hill you’re absolutely willing to die on?

(Example: cereal is soup, socks with sandals are elite, etc.)

Chocolate and crisps are an elite combo

What everyday task makes you feel oddly powerful?

Quite frankly just being able to stand up straight most of the day

If your personality were a snack, what would it be and why?

Snickers - because I’m nutty

Coffee or tea — and how specific is your order?

Tea and when it’s made the spoon must be stirred anticlockwise all the time

Morning person or professional snooze-button athlete?

A morning person definitely

Favourite comfort TV show you’ve rewatched too many times?

Shameless

Sweet or savoury snacks forever — you must choose.

Savoury

Window seat or aisle seat?

I’m not bothered because I rarely use public transport and if I do, it’s an Uber

One song guaranteed to get you on the dance-floor?

Rihanna - work

If today had a theme song, what would it be?

I dreamed a dream

The most famous person you ever met was who?

Definitely Alex Ferguson

BOSSMAN. Your thoughts?

Quite simply a wizard and the best person I’ve ever worked with

Finally, write a few paragraphs about yourself.

My name is Jordan Anderton. and I am going bald (BOSSMAN NOTE: Paragraph...and "going" bald?)